Celebrity Divorces - Are they really quick and private?

Thursday Apr 13, 2017 Divorce

According to a study conducted by the Marriage Foundation celebrity marriages are twice as likely to end in divorce. We see it every week in the papers, our best loved celebrity couple has hit their demise and are reaching for that speedy divorce so that they can move on. But how is that achieved? What makes it quick? Where’s the privacy?


Well, in answering exactly what makes it quick the solution is really quite simple, money, and celebrities tend to have a bucket load of it. When a celebrity couple separate, they tend to both be on the same page. They are both on equal footings when it comes to money and reputation and therefore they are not always out looking to get one over on the other. I know what you’re thinking now, the Marcartny’s, right? But remember they were nowhere near on equal footing when it came to potential earning power.  Here you need to think about Gwyneth and Chris, Madonna and Guy, Jennifer and Brad. It is simply the case that joint assets owned are either sold sharpish or easily divided, because quite simply, there’s enough to go around.

What you will often hear about divorce is that it’s the paper work side of the procedure that takes the lengthiest time. Sending and receiving items from the Court and the waiting around for those items. What money can do is therefore not only have you agreeing the terms of the separation pretty sharpish but buy you assistants that personally lodge the paper work with the court and go and collect it as soon as the paper work is ready for such.  Before you know it, you’re at the Decree Nisi stage and waiting for the 6 weeks and 1 day before you’re applying for your Decree Absolute, therefore ending the marriage and your divorce procedure entirely.

Now not all celebrity divorces are quick and easy, we are often gripped by the headlines that follow the couples whose messy separations spiral out of control and into the front papers of our more salacious, gossip ridden tabloids. Why are we so obsessed? Because it’s relatable, and it’s comforting to know that, money really can’t buy you love.

The Marcatney v Marcatney divorce fiasco has gone down in British history as one of the most gripping and compelling this century. Was any of it private? Not one bit. They may as well have allowed camera’s into the court room that’s how public knowledge the ins and outs of it were. Now, what could this couple have done differently? Well perhaps not a whole lot. The only significant way to avoid ones marriage break down spilling into the public astrosphere is to simply avoid court altogether. No hearing, no judgement, no judgement, no record.

A divorce, in essence, should not require hearings, adjudications and therefore public interest. Divorce is just a collation of paper work that the parties do not need to attend court for, ever. Unless hotly contested by the other side. Do we know how much Madonna and Guy played with in their separation? No. Gwyn and Chris, did we read about maintenance costs and contact details. No. They were able to come to mutually convenient agreements to avoid the fracas and embarrassment that a hearing on the matters would have presented.

Want to keep your family life private? Keep it out of court and agree as much as you can between yourselves. It will save you money, time and a whole heap of speculation from the outside world. Want to speed up your mutually agreed separation, lodge the applications yourself if you have the time to spare. Celebrity perks don’t always have to come with the price after all.